Never turn down the JAHA

Most of the time understanding basically nothing that happens around me in the day is frustrating.  And definitely makes you doubt how you’re going to be able to teach anyone anything with relationships built solely off questions like “What is your name?”, “How many siblings do you have?”, “Where do you live?”, and “How many years do you have?” (direct translation).  I interact completely off facial reactions.  They’re smiling, must be something good.  I smile.  They are gasping, must be something surprising.  I look shocked.  They’re chuckling, must be a cute little joke.  I chuckle too but am also prepared to laugh harder with them if necessary.  They’re laughing, must be something really funny.  Is it about me?  It probably is.  Everyone keeps looking at me.  Yup, it’s about me.  They’re laughing harder.  Do I pretend I understand?  Should I laugh too?  Should I come up with a witty response?  Yup, that will never happen.  And this is how I’m building relationships, one fake laugh at a time.  Someday I know I’ll understand that punch line and laugh for real but for right now it’s a whole lot of what in the world is happening. 

But then there is something interesting about every day, every minute, every conversation being a complete mystery.  JAHA in Guarani means let’s go.  And oh the places you’ll go without knowing and with no preparation at all.  Following the word JAHA I have gone to the following places, unknowingly.

1)   A wedding.  In my pajamas.  Weddings are at night here apparently?  Literally I walked in as the bride walked down the aisle in her beautiful white dress as I’m standing 5 feet behind her.  Dear Bride, sorry for photo bombing all your pictures.  Love, the American.

2)   A 3 hour hike to the waterfall when I thought we were just going to milk the cows so I was wearing flip flops without sunscreen.  Help.

3)   Church, again in my pajamas.  Since when is church on Friday night?  Also, how is two women singing song after song (poorly, mind you) karaoke style fun for anyone? 

4)   A soccer game.  You had to pay to get in.  I didn’t have money.  So awkward.  Please, let the rich American borrow money from you.

5)   The school.  Sounds normal except for the fact that I was expected to make a speech about who I was and what I was doing there.  Don’t worry that I don’t know what I’m doing here in English.  Let me just translate “no idea” to guarani real fast.  Yup, no idea.

6)   To kill a chicken.  Normal.

7)   Another 3 hour hike to a tree with an unusual fruit growing on it, just because she was curious.  I did say I liked walking so I guess that was my own fault. 

8)   The hairdresser.  Every girl needs her hair braided.  Dear hairdresser, sorry that I don’t brush my hair, nor wash it as frequently as you Paraguayans would like.  I wasn’t prepared.  Love, the American.

9)   To cut the coconut tree leaves off using a massive machete on a crazy long bamboo pole.  The cows have to eat something. 

10)  To the fields, once again in my pajamas.  Just to look at the stars.  Which by the way are drop dead gorgeous. 

And that’s that so far.  I hope your life is as mysterious and beautifully confusing as mine.  And life lesson for you all:  Never say no to a JAHA.  The most wonderful things happen when you least expect it.  Or in my case can’t expect it.  Because I know nothing.  Literally nothing.